Thus Spaketh Idd Salim

Last Friday, after all the Females I had poked and in-boxed snubbed going out with me because I always focus more on the Pool Table than the Female I am with while clubbing, I decided to Call Teddy so that we can go to Westlands at Qz and shoot some Pool. Gz up, hoz down and we both pitiad by Nandos/Galittos and stuffed ourselves with Chicken Thighs. Who said money cant buy thighs?

And so Westlands it was. I met with my old Campus Friend, Marto, (yes, I went to campus. UoN for 2 and 1/2 years. Ask Sebi and Knoxx. But I dropped out.) and he told me about this new mobile website he had just finished after being inspired by my post on how 10 serious Kenyans will be Millionaires before October . He decided to focus on item 8.

So he needed my help on how to monetize the idea and also how to secure the site from hackers. We met later the next day and for 5% shares agreement, I gladly did this.

Step in LaidInKenya (LiK)

LaidInKenya is a Kenyan’s dream. An East African’s dream. Actually, an African’s dream! LiK is an adult personals website with one mission:

To help anyone and everyone get laid by aggregating an e-pool of layers and layees. Be your orientation Straight or Gay, Normal sex or mtandikano, Kakyabali or just oral, you will find at least 10 people to fulfill your fantasy.

LaidInKenya has the following offerings:

• Age Check – No one under 18 is allowed. Someni Viijana.
• Lay-Mates - Everyone will have a personal to-do list (no pun intended) and she/he can always add, delete people from it. This is a personal private list. Not a public facebookesque friends list. Chako ni chako.
• Inbox Messaging – With the Inbox and emoticons like Spank, Kiss, Nugde and Flirt, you will not be short of ways of expressing yourself on LiK.
• Trial-Period – On registration, as soon as you fill in your profile and upload an avatar, you will have 7 days of FULL site use to enjoy all the offerings before having to pay membership fees.
• Registration and Confirmation – There is a registration and confirmation algorithm that makes sure the registered users are unique and real. You are assured that ALL members there are legit and not jokers.
• Members Only – A membership fee of KSHS 100 per month ama 1000 per year ensures that LiK members are only the serious people you want to associate with.
• Discreet SMS Chat – You will send and receive SMSes between you and your Laymate without ever needing or having to exchange numbers. LiK has a proprietary SMS engine that takes care of all the discreet routing. How cool is that!!?
• Continuous Development – Knowing Marto, he will not settle for what he has. LiK will always continue to evolve. he talked to me about a lot of features he will add in good time. Let us wait and get amazed.

What about the Kids?

To protect the Kids from Indecent exposure, LiK has RTA Meta tags and ALL Search Engines recognize it as an Adult website. Also, LiK has a ‘We ID’ identity and one MUST consent that they are 18+ from the home-page. Talk about an in-your-face disclaimer. That is the meanest and ugliest e-bouncer you can get.

Also, Marto requested I integrated a skeleton version of the ZungukaPay platform and I just activated the ZAP and Mpesa modules for him to be able to receive payments for his site and auto-magically activate user Accounts. Because Age-vetting is done at the Mpesa registration Level, this further proves that our user is of mature age and of a conscientious frame of mind.

Investment Opportunity

Being a very talented developer, but no Daddy’s money and in a country where no banks can lend coders money to pursue their ‘high risk’ ideas, Marto told me to source for an Investor willing to act as a silent partner and can invest a lumpsum of KSHS 2.5 – 5M to be used for advertising. He is offering 10 – 20% lifetime shares for this.

I suggest anyone who has money to spare to invest in this opportunity TODAY!. Trust me, you don’t want to be that guy who will be salivating and kicking himself 8 months down the line saying, ‘Damn! I knew about that offer and could Invest but fear and greed got the better of me!!’

Marto can be reached on : thebed AT laidinkenya . com

Join LiK On Facebook

Only time will tell. 9 More millionaire Slots left. Laleni tu.

Back to Code!