Thus Spaketh Idd Salim

Kampala

It is said that Kenyans are emotional wrecks with delusions of grandeur. Tanzanians are haters. And Ugandans are beautiful and kind.

So, in  my unrelenting quest to reach absolute mkwanjalization,  I found my-self and my CEO in Kampala, Uganda. We were invited by a clientX to do a systemY. Hotel Africana was our abode and we stayed there for a week.

And then we met the women

They say the more you go towards the WEST of Africa, the more beautiful women become. The opposite is the same for men.  And so, on Tuesday night, our host decided we must go and see Kampala. Not just code.

So we went to StakeOut for Campus night (Super Tuesdays). I was on the pool table as always beating up any would-be challengers and everywhere I looked, I saw someone I would have described as THE MOST beautiful thing I have ever seen. I immediately wanted to impregnate her. Then another one passed by and made the former look like Windows 95. Such is Kampala! Ugandan women make Kenyan women look like a trial version of the female species. A demo beta test.

Technically Speaking, All UG women have a GREAT booty-sector (every Ugandan Woman is said to have a big future behind her). They are user-friendly and backward compatible. Most get spoilt by the Kla life and become Open-source, Multi-user and Shareware, but it is rare to get any FreeWare unless your kernel is as updated as mine.

Due to their user-friendliness, you are always warned against logging in (even for just a temporary guest session) to any ports they open. They always have some spyware that can penetrate even the most lubricated and hardened latex firewalls.

These women are equipped with a nice rack-space. god was generous. No wonder Uganda is gifted by nature.

Due to my matrimonial vows, I never got to test this theory, but it is said that Ugandan women have a surround system that is guaranteed to keep the neighbor awake as long as you are inserting the CDs properly while tuning and mixxing her properly. Whether portable officeware, Amorphous Mainframes, Clande 286es, just a simple quick switching proxy, you are guaranteed satisfaction.

Some/most UG gals care about their user interface so much that they will mostly dual-boot and run alot of background processes to make sure their needs are taken care of. You will find them preemptively multitasking to make sure their assets have the optimal RoI.

The fortunate/unfortunate thins about the UG gals is that they are very very user-friendly. They run a simple plug-n-pray interface and mostly have ONE master administrator account, but many privileged guest sessions. This in a way negates the admin confidence, but it makes the beautiful country happy.

Back to code!

Wazi.