NIC Bank should brace itself for a MAJOR client exodus

What transaction history? I can’t remember!!

To me, NIC Bank is the best bank in Kenya.

Si story mob.

At least from Jan last year when I opened an account.

I have never been made to feel like a king by a bank and never received calls asking me if I had breakfast before. I am so happy with NIC Bank.

My USD 10 per month charge gives me access to:

• A KSHS and USD account
• USSD Banking
• Online Banking
• CreditCard
• Debit card
• etc.

So, when I received an email this morning that they were switching to T24 Core banking system from Temenos, I grew a humongous boner. Hata nika-feel dizzy since sinaga damu mob kwa thighs. hehehe…

The mail spoke of nice things. A positive step forward by the bank that has been next-monthing the upgrade for over 1 year now.

The mail must have been typed in a hurry as it included gramatical errors, multiple fonts and bad formatting, but that is not the topic for today. I have a few issues with the mail below:

Dear Customer,
Thank you for choosing NIC as your bank of choice.

As communicated earlier we are in the process of upgrading our core banking system to T24 in order to provide you with more efficient services. This change will subsequently affect our online banking service-NIC Online which needs to be aligned to the new core banking system T24.

NIC Online will only be accessible until Friday 31st August 2012 at 4:00pm. Given this we recommend the following;

1. Please ensure that all your transactions through this service are processed by Friday 31st August 2012 at 4:00pm at the very latest.

2. Historical account transactional data (for instance statements, transactional listings etc) will not be available in the new system. We therefore recommend you log into the current system and download historical transactional data up until 30th August 2012.

We will be sending you more communication to ensure a smooth transition to the new NIC Online service including how to access and log into the new system.

We wish to take this opportunity to thank you for your custom, patience and understanding as we make this transition.

We are confident that the new system will allow us to provide you with a higher level of service.

For any queries, Please contact our call centre on 2888 217 /0711 041111 or email us on customercare@nic-bank.com.

Regards,
NIC Bank Customer Contact Centre
NIC House, Masaba Road. 1st Floor
P. O. Box 44599 – 00100 G.P.O. Nairobi
Tel: – (020) 2888217; 0711 041111; 0732 141111 Fax: (020) 2888523

So, the issues:

You mean to tell me 1.0

That I need to make sure that the transactions are processed before Friday? How about end-month standing orders for Satos? How about transactions that are pending e.g. Checks banked today and will clear next week Monday? How about that Mpesa transaction that I will do at 2PM Friday, and it takes 4 hours like SOME do? Will these be lost? Will this be the responsibility of the client?

You mean to tell me 2.0

That I will not have my BANKING HISTORY anymore? Are you kidding me? Wtf? How do I get loans, Visas to ‘heaven/majuu’ places like US and UK and Uganda without my 6 months bank statement to prove to them that I am not planning to migrate there and I will actually come back to Africa? Oh, I can print and have it before NIC transmogrifies the data? How will NIC Certify the Statement without historical data? Do we now ear-mark our banking-day-one to Sept 3, 2012?

The only memory we like losing if that of bad sex. Si ya transactions bana. Kwani this Temeno’s system has no history support? No Backward compatibility or data import?

Heh! Enyewe sweetie nakupenda, but bila your usual round nipples and big sexy eyes, I might start talking to Wangechi (Equity – Yikes!!!) or Scholastica (KCB) or Ms Patel (Baroda). hehehe. Ngumu.

Na ni hayo tu. Salim ameongea.

Back to code.

Wazi.